For comparison sakes, let’s suppose a professional, full-body, whole-hour massage cost you $80.

I occasionally employ an awesome masseuse who charges $40 including my $5 tip.

She doesn’t just “mimic the feel of the human thumb”, she employs two whole hands! .. and forearms when appropriate.

She also goes straight to the knots and hot spots, working them expertly to untie the knots and loosen the tightness where it exists.

… as opposed to some electric-motor-driven rollers crawling around in places that were convenient to design into a mechanical device.

This ugly plastic monstrosity of a chair costs about the same as 30 to 60 massages.

One real massage every week, month, or so, would be a full-body treat that will be around after this past-warranty pile of sawdust, scrap-iron and plastic starts taking up space in the landfill.

This aesthetic nightmare also employs a few sub-subsistence Asian employees and a shipping magnate, instead of your neighbor.

If you have ever had a good professional massage, you would not even consider taking up the space in your home with this thing.

Unless, of course, you prefer plastic touch to human contact.